For awhile, I felt like I was on the road to perdition in my life. Have you ever felt that way? You take two steps forward then eight steps back. Doors slam in your face. Faltering Faith. Sleepless Nights. Slight and Blight Prayer Life. People who said they will never leave your side flee at the slightest breath of opposition? And you find yourself alone. Is it alone or simply solitude? Despite all that happened, I knew that God would not allow me to slip and fall through the cracks, especially when I desperately clung to His hand and the hem of His garment. Then just how did I end up on the island of Patmos?
You know the story, right? In the book of Revelation where John is isolated from humanity and exiled to the island of Patmos, a small rocky island in the Aegean Sea? John reveals that he was preaching the word of God and presenting testimony for Jesus when he was exiled. God’s words to him were, “Write in a book” (Revelation 1:11) and “Write down what you have seen – both the things that are now happening and the things that will happen” (Revelation 1:19).
So imagine my surprise as I was praying for God to show me why I felt spiritually extradited and it seemed no matter how I tried, I could not get in the presence of people who were normally there. John always comes to mind when I go through this trial in my life and I know that in these moments of extreme silence and human absence, that God has set me aside for a purpose in Him. He has an assignment for me to do for His kingdom and if I am busy with my little life, then maybe, I won’t hear Him or see what is before me. As much as it hurts, I am forever grateful for a God who loves me this much. One who desires ALL of me so He can get ALL of my attention.
Today, God instructed me to go to Revelation 1 and read. As I read the book of Revelation, God revealed that He set me aside so I could be prepared to write for the various aspects of my life (journals, books, dissertation, lesson plans for work, etc.) and to clear my mind because He is shifting me in the atmosphere. I was planning a vacation but I wanted to have a book tour while on vacation. So I kept asking myself how exactly was I vacationing if I didn’t have any alone or “me” time. To answer this for me, God isolated me from everyone. People who I normally entrust with my spiritual life left for the summer, or are too busy with their lives to even stop and acknowledge me, or our friendship is at odds and we are not speaking at the moment. Whatever it is, God is present still and He knows that writing is my catharsis, so I was supposed to write and consult Him this time — NO MAN needed to intervene! Basically, God wanted His rightful place in my life, once and for all. And I was left pondering this……
God is also the ULTIMATE friend and He will always be there for us. At times, there are some times when we need to learn to let GOD be our first resort, instead of running to MAN! There is much work for me to do and some situations in my life would keep me from doing what God wants me to do. After two weeks of praying, I now see that God wants me to spread His Word and share my book as much as I can while I am traveling to various states and events this summer. It is not time for me to rest as I had thought, because God has paved the way for me to witness and along the way, people will bless me in ways unimaginable. And to prove this, I was blessed with a new car which I got the most AWESOME deal on this past Thursday (makes for great and pleasant traveling), and yesterday out of the blue a close friend invited me to Cirque Du Soleil and as soon as I hung up the phone with her, another friend demanded I accept free tickets to Disney World. So imagine if I did not take heed to God’s actions? I would’ve missed my ultimate purpose and perhaps sulked at the thought of “working” while on vacation. When in reality, Christians should be elated and prepared to work for God at any moment. God works behind the scenes and pushes us onstage for the performance.
I had been praying for “Less of Me, More of You” from God and to see Him bring this in fruition left me awestruck, when in actuality, I really shouldn’t be because NOTHING is too hard for our God. If you find yourself in the midst of thousands one day and then alone for days and weeks at a time, God has you in spiritual exile for an ordained purpose for His people. Be vigilant. He wants you to hear Him clearly as He prepares you for the assignment. It may take you out of your comfort zone and away from those you love, but in the end your reward is in heaven.
As I end this blog entry, I feel better because I have communicated with the Father and I am ecstatic about sharing Faith and her friends with youth in Florida and North Carolina. I will go wherever you want me to go, Lord. I will do whatever you want me to do because I know that you will take care of me. You are omnipresent and with me ALWAYS!